I've been here before and those of you who recognize my username will likely know my post is bound to be pathetic. I'm a 24-year old male who has lived with social anxiety for so long it feels like it's all I talk about. I'll be very open and admit that I've never had a girlfriend, been on exactly one date in my life, and am in fact still a virgin
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You need to work on your social anxiety before attempting to pursue another relationship. That is at the heart of your inability to get into one. While it's admirable to try to get back into the saddle and keep trying, your saddle isn't strapped in place and you'll just fall right back off. The more you fall off, the more banged up you'll get until eventually you'll be unfit to even ride the horse
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I don't think I'm terribly unattractive. I'm not a mean person and I do have some good points, but I'm also socially awkward and reserved. I've asked girls out before, but most often been met with "You're very sweet, but I'll have to pass," or "I have a boyfriend," and the one date I did have ended with never hearing from her again
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So I'm now far too anxious to approach women. I've tried online dating as well and I've considered going to a bar to try and meet them, but I'm much too anxious to even step into a club, much less approach a strange woman. So because I'm now too anxious to approach a woman or ask out ones I already know and like, my prospects of meeting women are very low and unlikely to change. I can only think that I'm much more attractive than I think or that my terrible fear of rejection is just incredibly obvious to women and that find it offputting
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Yes. I have tons of advice. My first piece of advise is "don't get dating advice from women". Their experience with dating is completely different and they generally don't understand OR CARE what it's like for socially awkward young men
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The first thing you need to tackle is anxiety. Do you have anxiety talking to men? Or do you just get anxious around women? That is a key distinction and fixing each requires different steps
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Next thing to tackle is understanding what attracts women to a man. Many of these attraction factors are within your control. Most guys make the mistake of thinking women are just like men and it's virtually all face and body. When they get no female attention it makes them believe they are ugly or somehow broken. This isn't the case. You just need to tailor your look and actions to what women find attractive. Do you know a place where you can research this information?
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